HNOC: "Hey? What's the matter?"
Boss: *breathing hard* "I don't know what's happening..."
HNOC: "Oh my God, is it your heart? Do I need to call 9-1-1??"
Boss: "No... it's something else..."
HNOC: "Like what, are you dizzy? Seeing spots? What's goin' on?"
Boss: *starts to cry* "I don't even know anymore!!"
HNOC: *runs over, kneels down, hugs Boss*
Boss: "I think... I don't..."
HNOC: "What? You don't think what?"
Boss: "I don't think any of this is real!!"
HNOC: *looks over at desk, sees near empty plastic baggie*
Boss: *shakes while crying*
HNOC: "Oh God, did you come to work on mushrooms again?"
Boss: "Noo!"
HNOC: "Well what was in this baggie? Looks like tiny pieces of dried shrooms."
Boss: "I didn't!"
HNOC: "You must've!" *checks his pupils, fully dilated*
HNOC: "Aww God, I can't babysit you today, it's weekly reports day..."
Boss: "You don't understand!!"
HNOC: "Uh, yeah, I do..."
Boss: "NONE OF THIS IS REAL!!"
HNOC: *gets her phone out* "I'm calling you a cab, you're going home!"
Boss: "This is all a play, being written as we experience it!!"
HNOC: "Yeah, I know, the walls are melting, groovy colors maaan..." *sarcasm*
Boss: "NOOO, this is serious!!" *slaps phone from her hands*
HNOC: "HEY! I get that you're tripping balls right now, but don't get shitty!"
Boss: "Answer me this: Do YOU remember coming in today?"
HNOC: "Uh, yeah, I'm HERE!"
Boss: "NO! I mean, leaving your house and driving here, do you remember??"
HNOC: *thinks about it* "Well, not really. But, it's just auto-pilot. Routine, happens all the time."
Boss: "That's just what He wants us to think!!"
HNOC: "Who's He??"
Boss: "The sick fuck with a God-complex who's creating this reality as we speak!"
HNOC: "OK, NOW I'm taking you home myself..."
Boss: "Listen!! This is deeper and darker than you can even imagine!"
HNOC: *shakes head* "OK, alright... try me!"
Boss: "Look out the window, into the parking lot..."
HNOC: *looks out, sees parking lot* "Yeah, so. What about it?"
Boss: "Now just look out the window..."
HNOC: *does it* "OK... holy shit... what the fuck just happened?
Boss: "What is it??"
HNOC: "There's no parking lot. It's just blank white snow, like nothing's out there!"
Boss: "SEE?? It's because I didn't say parking lot, so it doesn't exist!!"
HNOC: "Wait, so you think YOU are creating all this?"
Boss: "NOOO! He didn't write the words parking lot for me to say, THAT'S why it wasn't there!"
HNOC: "OK, now you're scaring me..."
Boss: "As well you should be!"
HNOC: *looks back out, sees parking lot* "Hey, it's back!"
Boss: "Of course it is, He wrote the words again when I said them, THAT gave it Reality!"
HNOC: *very worried now... sits on floor beside Boss*
Boss: "Our entire World is the sick indulgence of a mad man!"
HNOC: "looks over to Boss*
Boss: "Watch this!" *whispers into Chick's ear*
They both sit and wait. Nothing happens.
Boss: "SEE??"
HNOC: "I don't know..."
Boss: "He didn't write what I whispered into your ear, therefore it couldn't happen!"
HNOC: "But you've been saying you were giving me a raise forever now!"
Boss: "And it STILL hasn't happened yet, has it??"
HNOC: "No."
Boss: "That's because He hasn't written it!!"
HNOC: "Ooorr, you could just be a cheap bastard?"
Boss: "I'm telling you, We are the imagination of a megalomaniacal control freak!!!"
HNOC: "Welp, that's enough crazy for today. I'm going now..."
Chick stands to leave the office.
HNOC: "Uuuh, where's the door?"
Boss: "I've already told you..."
HNOC: "Yeah, but I said DOOR!"
Boss: "Doesn't matter. He didn't write it in a way that it can exist for you to exit through."
HNOC: *plops back down onto floor next to Boss, begins crying*
Boss: "Believe me now?"
HNOC: "So how do we get out of here??"
Boss: "We don't... we don't..."
"Windows and doors, walls and floors, make up the boxes of our mind in The Outer Limits..."
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